No, it's a combination of (1) we don't see everything (or even 10%) of what gets posted, and (2) most people underestimate their own provocations and overestimate the provocations that come from others (by a good 10x), so it always feels like the other person started it and did worse.

In case anyone wants more explanation of these points, https://hn.algolia.com/?dateRange=all&page=0&prefix=false&qu... is all about (1) and https://hn.algolia.com/?dateRange=all&page=0&prefix=true&que... is all about (2).

Thanks for the explanation and for the detailed responses in the links.

I agree with them, but what ends up occurring is similar to situations in schoolyards where a bully who starts a confrontation isn’t punished, but the person who fights back is punished because it’s the person who fights back that causes a scene.

I will reach out you via email to delete my account.

I think this is a repetition of the same phenomenon. No one looks upon themselves as the bully or the person who started it. It always feels like the other person did worse.